20 Truths About Shikamaru and Temari
by whateverbro
Summary: Title says all. lj 20truths format.


**Twenty Truths About Nara Shikamaru and Sabaku No Temari**

1. When Shikaku had told him that all women were tender to the man they loved, Shikamaru scoffed. Now at age 20, as Shikamaru glares playfully at the troublesome woman burying her head on the crook of his neck, he finally understands.

2. Shikamaru didn't _really _run out of chakra.

3. Temari hated it when Shikamaru let her win one of their notorious shougi matches. So she upped the stakes by declaring every single game Strip Shougi. And although Temari always lost, the sex afterwards more than made up for it.

4. Shikamaru secretly enjoys those moments when Temari is jealous of Ino. Not only does it reassure him of her affections, but he gets to avoid the nosy blond as well. Seriously, who wouldn't want that?

5. When Kankuro had caught Shikamaru and Temari fooling around on the sofa that one night, Shikamaru had to use half of his chakra just to avoid the deranged puppeteer. It was only after Shikamaru had yelled, enough for the whole village to hear, that he was in love with his sister that Kankuro stopped, albeit begrudgingly. Someone who willingly spent time with his sister deserved _some _credit.

6. The first person to have ever noticed chemistry between the two was Yoshino. And it was during their match at the Chunin Exams that she knew she was the woman her son was eventually going to marry. After all, the blond reminded her so much of herself, she would be furious if her son actually chose to go through with those ridiculous dreams of his. (Nara men were never destined to end up with 'regular' women)

7. When Gaara had informed Temari of her ambassador duties in Konoha, he immediately noticed the faint blush across her cheeks. For a moment, he wondered what it meant. It was only after Temari came back a few weeks later, a significant change in her usually irritable mood, that he understood what it truly meant.

8. Temari knew Shikamaru was terrified of her brothers. So it took all her strength not to kiss him right then and there when she found out he'd actually asked them for her hand.

9. When Temari had heard of Pain's invasion on Konoha, she immediately found herself darting towards Gaara's office. Why the hell hasn't he dispatched backup? And if he has, why the hell wasn't she part of it?! Practically snapping the door off its hinges, Temari was met with a fully armored Gaara. She smirked.

10. Temari secretly liked babysitting Kurenai's son. Although she was never good with kids, Shikamaru seemed to complain a lot less around the little Sarutobi.

11. Shikamaru secretly liked babysitting Kurenai's son. As Temari picked the child up from the crib, Shikamaru would lean on the door frame, inwardly smiling at the nervous look Temari would issue the Sarutobi, as if asking the baby if she were holding him right. It kind of lengthened the 'Reasons to Marry Troublesome Suna Devil'.

12. When asked why they liked each other, Temari would flat out deny the accusation. Shikamaru would shrug and mutter "It's a curse".

13. Temari leaving was always bitter-sweet. The night before she left, they'd have sex. The night after she got back, they'd have better sex.

14. Temari has saved Shikamaru . . . in more ways than one.

15. Temari never liked it when Shikamaru smoked. She had once blurted out, "If _I _die, would you wear a giant fan on your back?" He glared at her, spat his cigarette out and stepped bitterly on it. He'd never had a smoke since.

16. Temari loved Suna for various reasons. It was her home, where she'd grown. And although it wasn't naturally convenient, weather-wise, she loved it anyway. Not to mention its abundance of pineapples. Yeah, pineapples were nice.

17. Surprisingly, Gaara was the most disapproving of their relationship. It was only until Temari had found a newly bought Icha Icha with a 'Remember, this is what Temari and that lazy ass of a ninja do there in the Leaf. Happy reading, lil bro! :)' scribbled on the first page that she'd realized why. The next day, she had to get a dent on her fan repaired.

18. Their relationship didn't start through cheesy confessions or proclamation of affections. Just two bottles of sake and a warm, inviting bed.

19. The most romantic peak of their relationship is ironically, when they fight. They both notice how the other always bites back scarring words, avoiding crossing any lines. When they fight, they aren't really mad. Just lacking attention. And even though they haven't realized it, the immense pile of wreck they are reduced to during these troubled times only serves as a diving board. They know they'll make up. They know that no amount of fights can truly break them. And honestly, the make up sex is amazing.

20. She is the bossiest, rudest, bluntest, most overbearing woman he has and ever will meet. She's troublesome and absolutely infuriating. Most of the time, he just wants to die than spend another minute with her.

He is the laziest, most good-for-nothing, most ineffective piece of crap this planet has ever spat out. Regardless of the height of his IQ, without the initiative to actually make something of his life, he will, no doubt, die an unbearably boring, meaningless death.

They live three days away. Their professions recommend the absence of emotions, especially romantic ties.

Exact opposites.

So it shouldn't come as a surprise that both of their villages are dumbfounded of as how they actually maintain their relationship. Villagers and ninjas alike are even more amazed that they are actually raising two children, both with the snarky mindset of a Subaku and the mental capacity of a Nara.

Really, how can anyone manage that?

Their relationship is a complete enigma to everyone. Most of the time, even to themselves.

You'd think their family would be an absolute mess.

But as Shikamaru gently caresses the soft, golden tresses on his elder daughter's head, he can't help but smile. He carefully positions the girl more comfortably on his side, as he looks to his wife, who is snuggled warmly on his other arm, their baby boy cradled in her arms. She's wearing that usual scowl and Shikamaru chuckles softly, careful not to wake any of them up.

Guess with everything they've been through, it shouldn't be a surprise they could manage something like that. At least when they're asleep.

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A/N: Sorry the 20th is so long. Lol. Hope you enjoyed reading. Review! :)


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